Saturday, October 31, 2009

Happy Halloween all!

Sorry for not writing for awhile. Lately i've been up and down but feeling better the last couple days. bear came over last night. This morning Domina and he went out shopping and brought home lunch. i ate and then went out shopping for a few things and came home.

W/we grilled a turkey on the rotisserie. It turned out a little burnt but tasted great with Mesquite marinade and wood smoke.

i changed into my maids uniform. i put on much lighter makeup to make me look pale and put on some really rosy blush, very thick eyeliner and mascara. i also put on my fishnet tights and various high heels and ballet style shoes. Wouldn't you know the gas grill ran out of propane and i had to go to the nearest convenience store as i was dressed. Domina sent bear with me to protect me. i sure got some reactions lol!

Domina, bear and i watched a couple flicks: Drag Me to Hell and Shutter. Domina played with bear the whole time while i laid there in my maids uniform :) leopet was outside handing out candy to the kids. Afterwards Domina took bear to bed for more play. i went up and changed into some PJ's since i'm sleeping downstairs of course.

i spent awhile cleaning up the kitchen and now am massaging my breasts.

i hope all had a great halloween!

btw i got my Ds Discussion site back up ( The server got corrupted but i got it fixed


Saturday, August 1, 2009

Domina is on vacation!

Today started oh so early! i woke up at 4am and got coffee going. i think the storm woke me up. Domina asked what i was doing since the alarm was set for 5. i said i was getting coffee going and taking a shower. Sleep just wasn't happening....

i drove Domina to the airport in the rain. i wore my grey and white striped tank top, capri jeans and sandals and bra with forms. i didn't put any makeup on but i did put my hair in a pony tail. i felt eyes from everyone at the airport.

W/we got in and checked in at the computer near the check in desk. It said W/we were too late! The flight was at 6:20. It was 6:07! W/we went to the counter and he repeated the same. Domina was so mad She cried. i felt terrible. The man told Her it would be $150 for the next flight or She could try stand by. She opted for standby.

W/we stopped at the Starbucks cafe and got a latte and blueberry muffin for Her and a tall coffee and blueberry scone for me. As W/we ate Domina told me to go home. She would call me if She couldn't get on.

i got home and got on my computer for awhile. i texted Her. She said She got it! yaaaaay! She was on Her way!

i went to bed but had a hard time sleeping. It was prolly all the coffee but i was so tired. At about 11 i woke up and texted Domina. She was waiting for a connecting flight. i went shopping. i picked up a bottle of fenugreek and red clover. i then went over to Walmart and got a can of Aveeno's Positively Smooth Shave Gel which i have read by several reviews reall works for really close shaves and to slow hair growth. i picked up body wash too.

leopet called and asked about lunch. i finished shopping and hurried home. leopet and i then went to IHOP for lunch. we had an incredibly long wait for our orders. The waitress was embarrassed and said they had a new cook. i wonder if there is something about transgendered people and restaurant service. i really don't want to be paranoid about it but this has happened before at a Chilis restaurant too.

we finally got our orders. we did have a nice talk.

From there i exchanged a few texts with Domina. Her connecting flight didn't happen so bear drove from the town T/they are staying and got Her. Both were frustrated.

leopet and i stopped at Sally's Beauty Supply and picked up some generic Matrix shampoo and conditioner and returned home.

leopet went outside to work on a project and i went for another nap.

i woke up at 4. leopet went to the store and picked up some toasted raviolli and spaghetti sauce.

we watched American Gangster by Russell Crow and Denzel Washington. Both of us thought it kind of long winded. i thought it was an interesting movie though.

Domina took some pictures from on top of the mountains with Her bf bear and sent them via phone.

She is happy now :) She will be gone until Wednesday i believe.


Monday, December 22, 2008

Important things a sissy should know and do

i think being a sissygirl is not only a persona but also a lifestyle. With any lifestyle there always seem to be things that are important to know and do. Some of the things i can think of are:

  1. Gender. A sissygirl can be thought of as being a third gender. Not a real man, not a real Woman, but a sissygirl. Being a sissy, one may strive to be either of the other genders but you'll never be one. Its best being the best sissygirl you can be.
  2. Learning. Since a sissygirl strives to be as close to a real Female its best to develop the mindset of what you want to be. A girl. Learn what is important to Women. Feminine clothing. Learn the different kinds of articles of clothing. Learn about makeup. Less is more. Try to make yourself pretty. Feel pretty. Love being pretty. Strive to do what Women do. The way They walk. One foot in front of the other instead of parallel. Always sit down when using the toilet. Real men stand, sissygirl's aren't men. Learn to the way Females talk. Read Women's magazines, etc. Watch Women, strive to be like them.
  3. If you are a submissive sissy or sissy slave. you must be owned. you must strive to find a Mistress or Master to serve.
These are some of the things i can think of. You might have other things you might see as important as well. Please comment them :)

sissy girl

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

The Journey

Sometimes i think its nice to think back and look how you got to where you are. Starting with the advent of the personal computer i had to get one and then i discovered that connectivity was where it was at. i purchased a 300 baud modem and subscribed to Compuserve. Back then it cost me around $6.50 an hour for the service and $7.00 an hour for the connection. Thankfully they soon provided a local connection that cost 24 cents. i spent many hours wandering the maze of menus on the system and found special interest groups (SIGS). i then found that there was one dealing with human sexuality and from there subjects like exhibitionism, Female Domination, BDSM etc was discussed. For some reason many of these things turned me on to think about especially Female Domination.

Over time i found local BBSs that sometimes featured fetishes and chat boards where you could role play. i felt so turned on by the many hours doing this. One time i subscribed to a service called Larry Land and spent most of the time in the chat areas. i heard that you could be what you wanted to be on the internet so i decided to try being a Mistress. i called Her Mistress Dominana. i thought i really developed Her well and had several followers there until i had a female sub. i felt it was all role play and fun. Until one day.... The female sub asked my measurements and i gave them to her. She saw right through them and told me that bra sizes were never odd and i felt so humiliated. i even tried it again but it just didn't feel right. From then on i would be who i am and not pretend anything. If i was told to do something i would do it as real as possible.

Later i found out about the Internet Relay Chat and its great possibilities. i got on it and soon found an online Mistress whom i served for a year. At the year point i had to move to the area where i am now and really looked at myself. i really needed real life lifestyle experiences. i soon found a couple on Adult Friend Finders and moved in with them over a period of a month. i was first the Mistress's submissive and it soon became Her 24/7 slave. i was with them for about 6 months and then i moved out into my own apartment.

i joined our local BDSM support group and became very involved with it and made many friends. Through them i was introduced to a new Mistress who i served as Her submissive for about 1 1/2 years until She moved away. i was broken hearted but got more involved with the group as a committee member.

i soon found another Mistress who i served occasionally. i really wasn't happy with it all and focused on being a committee person until i found my new Mistress who i met four years ago tomorrow. Tomorrow is Her birthday. W/we met and went out for O/our first date on Her birthday. The following Valentine's day i proposed and W/we were married about a year later.
All this time i felt i was a male submissive. i felt a bit put off every time i read or heard that this or that Mistress expected Her male subs to be sissies, feminized, whatever. i thought, "Can't a male submissive be masculine?", etc.

i then started to examine myself more deeply. i discovered that throughout my life i really didn't have a "manly" way about me. Once when i was talking with Mistress at work and it dawned on both of U/us that i am really a sissy. i am more feminine in a lot of ways. i like to giggle. i like pretty things. i enjoy beautiful music. i have a more feminine body. i also felt it hot to hear emasculating things told to me. i then started identifying myself as a sissy girl.

Mistress wasn't so happy having a girl for a husband but as time went W/we met a bi-male submissive who played with U/us and helped around the house and with a lot of things. Eventually he moved in with U/us. Now Mistress feels that She prefers me as a girl and happy that She also has a boy. W/we live in a Female led relationship and as W/we were talking tonight i think W/we have the dynamics for quite a lifestyle.

i thought about writing about lifestyle vs cyber or lifestyles tonight but thought this appropriate for now :)
sissy girl

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

my purse

Considering all things, i think the purse is the greatest accessory a sissy should have. Such a feminine article, having one with you at all times accomplishes several things. The first is that is allows you to empty the pockets and carry what was there in the purse. This is wonderful because now you won't have things like pens, lipstick, etc jutting into your thighs and jutting out producing unsightly looks.

Another thing, you can carry many more things that will certainly be useful at one time or another. A hairbrush to tend to your hair. Lipstick to freshen your lips up. Your wallet to pay for things, etc.

The purse is wonderful because all your things are kept in one place. No more scrambling to find your key, your wallet, etc as your leaving to shop. Its all there!
Things i keep in my purse now include:
  • Wallet
  • lipstick
  • Face powder
  • pen
  • notepad
  • keys
  • perfume
  • breath mints
  • second set of ear rings
  • baby wipes
  • tissues
  • change
  • cigarillos
  • lighter
  • cell phone
  • hair brush
  • comb
  • sinus medication
  • benadryl
  • nail file

There are things to think about as you are becoming more dependent on your purse. Since everything is right there to misplace it can be devastating. So always keep it in the same place. i hang mine on the coat rack.

Another thing to think of is while you are shopping, it is common to put your purse in the child seat in shopping carts. It is easy to wander away from your cart when shopping sometimes. You must not do that! i was quickly reminded not to do that the other day by an elderly lady as i returned to my cart while shopping down a crowded aisle. You might find your purse gone when you return.

Something else to think of is to clean out your purse from time to time. i have a habit of putting receipts in my purse as i purchase things. They can really add up and make your purse messy!

i am so glad that i took the advice and got a purse. i take it everywhere i go now. i don't know how i ever did without one!


sissy girl

Thursday, August 21, 2008


The topic of cuckolding seems to be more and more common on the net these days. Common sub-topics concerning this lifestyle/practice include 'Fantasy vs Reality', 'Be careful what you wish for....', 'Hotwifing vs cuckolding', etc. Like so many i stumbled upon the topic and became quite obsessed with the idea. As my sissy self was emerging, cuckolding seemed like a natural thing for U/us. The idea that the Wife, Mistress, Femdom, etc has complete freedom sexually while controlling Her sissy cuckold's sexuality seemed hot to me and quite a turn on. i read many articles on the web as well as many stories with cuckolding as the central theme on sites such as as well as discussion forums. Mistress had stated before that if She had wanted a girl She would have stayed with the girl She used to live with. Mistress also stated that She missed having a masculine man take Her in his arms, etc. It was a struggle for Her and one night She told me that dealing with me in my feminizing direction as well as cuckolding was too much to handle at once. She also had a connotation of the word 'cuckold' that it was mean and She didn't like that.

As time progressed Mistress found that She prefers me girly and enjoys making me Her 'Barbie Doll' by buying me feminine clothing as well as jewelry and perfume. It is all balanced out with Her submissive boyfriend leopet who lives with U/us.

Time further progressed and Mistress has introduced elements of cuckolding in O/our relationship. She now considers me Her sissy slave cuckold girl. As before when i came up with the idea, things like this seem to work best when Mistress takes an idea and makes it Her own.

This seems to work best since as i understand it, cuckolding is when the Mistress/Wife has the freedom. Where She is the one in control. Where She is the One making the decisions.

i now feel like i am less in control. i feel totally dependent on Mistress for any sexual relief. From the beginning Mistress has reserved the right to play with my sissy cock. It is not my property. It is Hers to play with. As She has said recently, "It is not your concern whether I play with your sissy cock or not". That was after i thanked Her for playing with it.

Mistress regularly plays with leopet usually while W/we are watching tv on a futon in front of it. i am quite aware that She is. he laying on Her right side and this girl on Her left. She holds Her wine glass or remote control in Her left. This is exciting to me. The denial. Knowing She is doing what She wants to.

Mistress knows i get off watching Her and leopet together making out and having sex. leopet actually enjoys being fucked mostly by Her but She climbs on top too. Sometimes i might enter Her bedroom and find T/them all naked and enjoying each other. Each time i feel almost overwhelmed and so turned on. Once She told me to play with my sissy cock while watching T/them. She watched me and told me that i could not cum. She later told me that it was a turn on for Her.

There are many elements to cuckolding that W/we have not done. Mistress is not interested in scouring bars looking for vanilla guys to have sex with. She must always be the dominant. i have not been made to 'clean Her up' after She has sex. i have not been made to wear a chastity device. Mistress prefers for now that i follow Her rules to not play with myself. Mistress is careful in using humiliation as part of it.

W/we will see where it progresses from here. As it is, i am Her girl, leopet is Her boy, She is the ruler of this house.

W/we are happy :)

sissy girl

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

sissy mindset

i don't feel that i am a crossdresser. i do crossdress but i feel that i am more than that. As a sissy i could probably be categorized as a tranny, or t-girl. i love feeling and being a girl as much as i can be. Demasculization which is stripping the masculine from someone is really hot to me. Each 'tipping point' which are kind of like buttons which are pushed resulting in demasculating effects are thrilling.

Hearing Mistress tell me i make a better girl than a guy

Mistress telling me to paint each big toe after painting Her toes and progressing with more and more until i regularly paint all my nails

Starting with wearing panties, then with camisoles to wearing all girls clothes
Being referred to in feminine pronouns (she, her, etc) and hearing Mistress referring to myself that way to others.

Hearing Mistress tell others that i am Her sissy cuckold
Learning mannerisms of females and adopting them for myself; walking, talking, using the bathroom sitting down, etc.

Going out and about thinking of myself as a girl and feeling elated when i hear "Thank you ma'am", or a sales lady telling another that "she is looking for this in pink", etc

Finding myself visualizing myself as the woman wearing this or that instead of the men.

i enjoy listening to feminizing audio as well as cuckold audio. One that i've listened to kind of helps one identify more as a female:

1. Girls love wearing lipstick

Boys don't like lipstick

you wear lipstick

you are a girl

(i say) i am a girl

2. Girls wear panties

Boys don't wear panties

you wear panties

you are a girl

(i say) i am a girl

3. Girls love doing girl things

Boys do boy things

you do girl things

you are a girl

(i say) i am a girl

i find feminine things more and more fun and boy things for me more boring.

i love being a sissy!

sissy girl